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The End of an Era

Dorothy Grace "graduated" from preschool a week ago and I cannot really even believe it. I know that most of life has felt like we are in a weird time warp since 2020, but somehow, this feels crazy to me. Perhaps it is because she's my last baby. Perhaps it is because that's just it - in comparison to my "big" kids, she is still the littlest baby. Perhaps it is because I'm already dreading the speeding train at which life happens once we enter kindergarten.
All I know is this: Dorothy Grace, you are magic. To have a front row seat to your life brings me more joy than I'll ever be able to put into words. You are funny, you are endearing, you are witty, you are creative, you are 5 going on 13.
The saddest day of this past year was when we got you your first haircut. Yep, we made it to five, but mainly because your curls are what my mama dreams were made of. We had to cut about 6 inches off of your hair and when we did, your ringlets fell heavy and though you have a few curly strands, your curls are pretty much gone. As much as I mourn it, I also am so thankful for the millions and photos and videos that I'll stare at for the rest of my life remembering that precious mop.
You are just so little... at least that is what we keep telling you. You're just SO LITTLE. But sister, I am so sad because I'm obivously in denial that you are turning from this little baby muffin toot into a little girl full of ideas, plans, friends, songs, dances... painfully beautiful to admit, because I know I can't and really don't mean it when I say it, but I wish I could keep you little.
You are the final puzzle piece to our little nuclear family. You are the one we waited for, pleaded and prayed for, dreamed of and were completely surprised by... our miracle girl. Your life is a testimony to the world that God is the creator of life, author of it and over the science that He puts into motion. It gives me the most confidence to know that you are His... and if you are, then Eleanor and Tripp are His too. We are simply the parents He chose to insanely love you, shepherd and enjoy you as we raise you three to go out into the world and pretend to be adults like dad and I are. You are His. What a privilige, what a calling.
I can't wait to see you blossom next year. Really until this year, you haven't had a community of friends to call your own being the third sibling on our crazy family calendar. But you've started to make your own friends, and I have loved becoming friends with their families, and I am so excited for the even more relationships to make as you start your 13 years of school. Praying that you are brave, kind, inclusive, respectful and excited for new things to learn, new friends to make, and new moments to experience new things.
May the Lord bless you, keep you, the Lord make His face to shine upon you and be gracious to you; the Lord turn His face toward you and give you peace. Numbers 6. 24-26 As you begin, He's got you. I may bawl my face on the that first day of school because my mama days with Dorothy Grace will never look the same and quite frankly, I'll blink and you'll be in logic school (ahem, Eleanor and Tripp). I want to savor it all. I want to be present for it all. I want to rejoice that you aren't staying little, but that the Lord has a beautiful plan for you life. I love you so, so much you little poop.
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